I Want To Go To Rio, Spend A Week In Paris France …

I had it all planned out. I would take the train to LA, check my mail, go to VP’s house, head to Hollywood and Highland to get some shots for a power point I need to put together, maybe have a drink with VP, sleep, go to yoga, jump around and act wacky with the groundlings, head to DL’s place for some hot sex.
That was the plan.  What happened was a little more like this:
I caught the train to LA and a conductor who I have been flirting with for several years suggested something sexy, and I grabbed my bag and followed him down into the luggage room.  We made out for a little bit and I could hear the other conductors on their walkie talkies, prowling around in the next room.
He pulled my shirt up and started sucking on my tits.  I reached into my purse, grabbed a glove, some lube and a dildo.  I pulled my fishnets down from under my red mini-skirt and reclined on a piece of black luggage.  It was the sort that had wheels but was more of a bag than a suitcase.  It was going to Santa Barbra.  I put a glove on the conductor and told him to fuck me with the dildo.  After a few minutes I realized that I wanted to play acrobat so I climbed up to the top rack and put my feet on the other side of the rack.  Can you see me there balanced up on the luggage rack, fishnets down around my ankles, train conductor fucking me with a red dildo while he continues to suck on my tits? The train is in motion and I can see the ocean through the window.  I’m more concerned with my imminent orgasm.  I can hear some walkie talkie action and I’m trying not to moan to loudly but I’m having an awesome time suspended on the luggage rack on a train with the ocean in the backdrop.  I couldn’t help it – when I came I moaned a little too loudly.  The walkie talkie noise stopped, but I could tell they were not coming in to the luggage room.  They were listening.  I tried not to giggle too much as I pulled up my stockings.
I put away the lube, condoms, and gloves and we scampered upstairs.  None of the other conductors seemed to have noticed at all.  None of them said anything, not of them seemed to be too close.  I think we may have gone totally undetected.  What a sexy way to start the weekend.
Made it to LA, checked the mail, called VP to let him know I was on the way.  When I arrived there were a couple of boys sitting on his sofa, they left almost as soon as I said hello.  As they were going out some furniture guys came in to replace a piece of furniture that had a stripped screw.  Replacing an entire piece of furniture because a screw is stripped goes against my Marxist sensibilities.  My friend VP is in the money business and does not have the voice of Karl Marx in his head, he has Karl’s picture on his dart board.
I love to watch boys work so I sat on the sofa and watched them do their thing.  I tried to make small talk with VP but he was not feeling well.  I wanted to just drop my suitcase and run to get those pictures but I felt like I had to be polite.
It became rapidly apparent that VP had spent the previous evening doing cocaine and having a tremendous amount of sex.  He was too tired to cope with me.  He said something about judging people and looked at me cross-eyed.  I was not sure exactly what I had done but I was certain that he did not approve.  At one point he suggested that I might need therapy because I did not want to get rid of my fine collection of sex toys. After the worker boys left VP said to me “You can’t stay here tonight” and then suggested that I stay in a hostel.
He threw me out in the most polite way he could.  He took me to a hostel and rented a room for me.  The room was on the first floor, had a window on Fairfax, and low thread count sheets.  I guess that’s what I get for bringing up Marx.  Fuck.  I was not sure how I felt about the situation.  He had plenty of room for me.  I was not going to get in his way.  He just took me down the street and plopped me in a hostel.  I wanted to cry but I bought a pack of cigarettes instead.  People in LA are so fucking flakey.
I try to pretend it does not matter.  I smoke.  I have a beer.  I do my laundry with Europeans.  I toss and turn as a drug deal is made outside my window at 4 am.
Next morning I head to the groundlings to jump around and act wacky.  All goes smoothly.  Wackiness accomplished.  I bum a ride to DLs, ditch my stuff there and head to the mall to get the pictures.  When I’m done shooting I call DL to tell him I’m on my way back.  He asks me to stall.  I get some Thai food and as I’m finishing “The Dude” appears and asks me if I’ll have a beer with him.  I say yes, but mean no.  I give him a cigarette and he asks me if he can walk me to my destination.  I say yes.  We walk and smoke and he tells me his wife left him and that I am beautiful.  I’m pretty sure he isn’t Jeff Bridges but who knows with the shit that goes on here.  We make the most minimum amount of conversation.  I give him the rest of my dinner and head in to DLs where I am planning on getting some action.
DL and I have been flirting for years.  DL used to be my neighbor but I don’t sleep with my neighbors.  I like drama-free sex and sleeping with the neighbor does not promise such an arrangement.
DL is a tough looking dude.  I expected the sex to be as hot as he is.  I was wrong.  I think he was scared of me.  It was kind of cute but a tad pathetic.  He always has a line of sexy strippers dating him so  I figured that they kept coming back for some reason.  Now I know what that reason is – to cuddle!
I was really hoping to get off, he wanted to cuddle.  I pushed him in the bed and told him to glove up. He couldn’t figure out how to get into the gloves.  I put the thing on him.  He got up and wandered around.  I pulled out the dildo and started to masturbate in his bed.  I was getting down fucking myself in the ass.  He was adjusting the lighting.  I have has so little sex in the last several months I don’t give a shit about the lighting – come over here and fuck me.  But he really couldn’t.  I’m way too much woman for most guys.  This one was no exception.
At this point I would ordinarily excuse myself but I was planning on spending the night, thinking it would be great all night sex.  At some point I actually asked him if he would read to me while I masturbated in his bed.  He declined and instead put on fight club.  I had never seen fight club and it turns out it was the highlight of the evening.
At some point after the cuddling and fight club watching  he suggested sex.  I told him I had to be out the door in a couple hours and that I needed sleep.  Then I pulled the sleeping trick on him.  I feigned passing out.  I hate having to pretend to be asleep because you are done having inadequate sex with someone.  I much prefer to have sex with strangers in public toilets – then when its not so good at least you don’t have to cuddle.

2 thoughts on “I Want To Go To Rio, Spend A Week In Paris France …

Add yours

  1. LOL!!! I had always wondered how DL would be in bed. Cuddly I guess. Oh well.
    At least Fight Club is really good.
    I miss the hot bathroom sex. And the piano at the Improv…

  2. LOL Very funny, especially where he put the fight on instead of thoroughly not cuddling you! Some guys don’t like to be overwhelmed in bed and fear the loss of control, where as others can handle it 😉

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