Fuck The Patriarchy — Where Are The Scissors?

My flight was at 6 Am. The first train to logan was at 530. I spent the night in the airport with Lorelei. I got in a wheelchair and was wheeled to my gate. I took a sleeping pill and woke up in LA at 11 AM. I went to the post office. I was … Continue reading Fuck The Patriarchy — Where Are The Scissors?

I am sorry liver. That was totally uncalled for. Please forgive me.

Some time back I assumed that finishing school would make me a little batty. I have been a career student for a long time. Being a never quite finished graduate student has become part of my identity. I assumed that I would be a mess when I finally finished. I was right. I have been … Continue reading I am sorry liver. That was totally uncalled for. Please forgive me.

The John Waters Christmas Hustle

I got all worked up to meet John Waters. I’m used to Hollywood meet and greet events. If the general admission tx is $30 bucks and the meet and greet after party tix is $100 I naturally expect that there is a cocktail party after the fact. This seems like a basic thing to expect. … Continue reading The John Waters Christmas Hustle

Little Boy Strippers

I was drunk, I was in a jaded and bitter mood, but I was determined to make the most of this funny little town. So I went to the gay bar. And there were boy strippers. Three of them. In their panties. In their muscles. In their chucks. I got myself a drink and stack … Continue reading Little Boy Strippers

An Office Job

So, yesterday I had a totally booked day, then one client canceled, and another took his place, booked an overnight, then my earlier client canceled, and I figured I could sleep in, but then I woke up to the phone ringing and Mr. replacement canceling. I was sad and a tad worried. I need money, … Continue reading An Office Job

I Pissed on a Bitch in Target

I wish I had been in the mood to piss on him out in the open in the middle of the store. Like in Ladies Panties or something.  Sadly we went to the bathroom.  I was already at the store shopping, visiting a friend who can’t get a good job with zirs master degree so … Continue reading I Pissed on a Bitch in Target

Having A Drink at the Titty Bar

Recently I was at the titty bar and a boy who I have seen before appeared before I was even ready.  He texted me and told me that he was upstairs waiting for me.  I came upstairs not even sure who I was looking for only to see that cute little bitch.  Oh, you.  I … Continue reading Having A Drink at the Titty Bar

I Got Drunk and Grabbed Kojak’s Butt!

I went to NYC for a few days for a little RnR. I ordered a bottle of really delicious wine with dinner, intending it to be for the four of us. Well for reasons we don't need to get into I ended up drinking most of it. Then we went to see 'Who Loves You, … Continue reading I Got Drunk and Grabbed Kojak’s Butt!

Prepare To Enter …

I have been heading to the strip club a lot lately. Most of the time things are sexy, yet timid. I dance for some strangers, make a little money, dance on the pole, and get home in time to make it to six am yoga. Last night was by far the strangest night I have … Continue reading Prepare To Enter …

Tips for Keeping Your Pussy Healthy

One of the best things about being a sexpert is that sometimes my childhood friends will ask me for sex advice. I dislike a lot of needy email but when people I care about trust me with their secrets I feel all warm and cozy, like I have done something useful with my life. Today … Continue reading Tips for Keeping Your Pussy Healthy