Fuck The Patriarchy — Where Are The Scissors?

My flight was at 6 Am. The first train to logan was at 530. I spent the night in the airport with Lorelei. I got in a wheelchair and was wheeled to my gate. I took a sleeping pill and woke up in LA at 11 AM. I went to the post office. I was … Continue reading Fuck The Patriarchy — Where Are The Scissors?

If I’m Gonna Be Heckled I’m Gonna Go Back To Doing Stand Up

I’m gonna write about my neighbor because I hate her. I generally try to get along with the people I live near. I’m not that friendly but I’m not a shitty neighbor. I try to keep the noise down after the normal day person hours. I generally live a much quieter life than I would … Continue reading If I’m Gonna Be Heckled I’m Gonna Go Back To Doing Stand Up

On Being a Fat Stripper

Let me start off by saying that I am not fat. I do not have a complex. I do not think I am fat. For the industry I am often considered to be fat. So, now you know. My body is actually quite lovely. My measurements are 36D, 25,40. I have a tiny middle with … Continue reading On Being a Fat Stripper

I Have Food, This is Good

After reading my rant, sure as shit, some bitches came climbing out of the wood work all butt hurt saying “I’m a regular, no?” My response of ‘who is this?’ Didn’t exactly please them. There is no fighting the fact that I am in a bad mood. I have all these big plans but every … Continue reading I Have Food, This is Good

A Rant

I’m just gonna bitch about my life for a second and you, dear reader, will either read it, ignore it, label me an entitled little while girl and move on, or whatever the fuck you want. Who knows maybe it will be your favorite and you will print it out and send it to people … Continue reading A Rant

Someone To Kick In The Balls

Shortly after I tweeted that I wanted to kick someone in the balls all night, mr sore nuts came skipping into the building. I’m sure he had a time of finding of me. Luckily he knew to ask for The Dancer Friday, because otherwise he never would have found me in the packed club. There … Continue reading Someone To Kick In The Balls

Just a Quick Update

I'm in San Diego. When I'm in New England I get a lot of people on my phone and in my inbox suggesting that they want to play when I am in SoCal. Well I am here bitches! I have limited time to play in San Diego through the 3rd of April. I am ONLY … Continue reading Just a Quick Update

Day Two: Public Blowjob

I met a bitch who I have seen before.  We met in a quiet, cozy, charming New England tea house.  There were people sitting right behind us.  They were chatting, I was a little too loud.  I talked about pissing and dildos.  At one point they stopped talking because they had clearly overheard something that … Continue reading Day Two: Public Blowjob