I laid there waiting for hours, masturbating, wondering “what if the plumber is hot” imagining that the dude who was coming to fix my toilet was gonna be a GQ model, expecting him to be an old fat while plumber — but then he wasn’t bad. He showed up at 10PM and I asked him … Continue reading I Fucked The Plumber
Not Getting Laid I often get told “NO” by people I actually want to play with. I don’t know if this is because I am using ‘striper seduction tricks’ or because people don’t really want to fuck me. It is a strange mix of emotional angst. I m very confidant as a sexual being, … Continue reading Really Dirty?
Pink was visually intimidating. She was big and mean looking. Her septum was pierced. She looked like a bull. She was wide and had a strong walk and a stance like a linebacker. She kept her hair buzz cut short. People would often mistake Pink for a man. Common perceptions of gender are limited to … Continue reading I had a lover, her name was Pink.
There is nothing sexy about sandy eggo. Not a god dam thing. Last year when school started I sent my girlfriend back east and I put my nose in a book. bout a hundred of em' actually. A year later I looked up to realize that this town managed to turn me into a cold … Continue reading I Got Laid!
Yesterday I had several hours to masturbate. I stayed in bed with my vibrator most of the day. Today I woke up and thought I would have a little AM action so I rolled over and grabbed my plug in lover, but alas the thing was dead. NOOOOOOOOOOO! This is horrible. My Hitachi Magic Wand … Continue reading If I Had Time I Would Have A Memorial
I’m gonna post a few things in this blog. First and foremost : I need a couple of big strong boys to help me lift some heavy stuff (IN LA and SAN DIEGO) the day after Thanksgiving. Should only take an hour or so. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org if you can help. Please refrain from … Continue reading A Real ClusterFuck Of A Blog
Welfare, teen mothers, food stamps, the rising price of gas, the war in the middle east, the wall we are building at the US / Mexico border. I have opinions about them all. But in March I wrote about sex and I had ten thousand individual visitors to my blog so sex is what you … Continue reading Sex — I Recommend You Have Some!
Aggg my chucks were stolen. I walked to the Improv and then put my high heels on. I stashed my chucks behind the booth and didn't think anything of it. When I was ready to leave my chucks were missing. Gone. Just gone. Fuck it looks like I'm walking home in my high heels. Dammit. … Continue reading Shoes and Sex
Today I wish to contemplate the fake orgasm. I have found myself wondering why women continue to feed the egos of men through perpetuating the fake orgasm. It’s such a cliché to fake one – my god why are we still doing this? And why don’t men know how to cope with blatant sexual advances? … Continue reading The Politics Of Faking An Orgasm
The privileged white male complex has never once impressed me. In fact anyone who thinks that they are better than other people makes me want to scream. I have a very low tolerance for bigots. Saturday I experienced discrimination that would have been much easier to take if it hadn’t been so two faced. I … Continue reading Paying For The Social Inadequacies Of Men